SNOBELEN: Remembering Rob Ford for his spirit and compassion

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A good friend of mine is fond of reminding me of the ancient observation that no good deed goes unpunished. Truer words are hard to find.  

In a similar vein, it seems a universal truth that acts of kindness and generosity are forgotten immediately, while moments of weakness live forever. This is particularly true for the hardy souls who toil in public life.  

Shed no crocodile tears for the people who seek the spotlight and then object when the glare reaches their darker secrets. Some things just come with the territory.  

But there are times when the fascination with the seemlier side of public figures is excessive and cruel. The most cowardly among us enjoy punching down, saving their most vile rants for those who cannot defend themselves.  

Most of us have witnessed (or endured) the boss who delights in publicly humiliating an underling. They are cowards. The same can be said for the “enlightened” folks who tear down statues and defile the legacy of our nation’s founders.  

The cowards always miss the obvious: We are all human and subject to the imperfections that come with humanity. We also have the capacity for humility, kindness and compassion, traits that are absent when the blood of the defenceless causes a churning of the water.  

Canada is a profoundly decent country. As a nation, we tread more gently on the personal lives of public figures than the media circus experienced in other countries. But the line between the public’s need to know and the feeding of our most scandalous instincts is a fine one.  

That line is surely crossed when the subject is no longer relevant in public life. All of which explains my reluctance to watch the recent Netflix documentary Trainwreck: Mayor of Mayhem.    

Rob Ford has been dead for a decade. Stirring the ashes of his political and private life at this late date seems pointless.  

This is particularly true for a documentary that spends little or no time seeking out new information about the man. It is a rehash of headlines from a decade ago as the media chased a man who was running from his demons.  

The story of addiction is familiar to many Canadian families. Embarrassment is the easy part. The real darkness is constant worry in the face of relentless denial and the depths of depravity caused by what addicts call stinking thinking.  

Rob Ford went through his addiction in the full glare of the media. While that time was not easy to watch, his office and public responsibility made scrutiny necessary. But is it necessary to revisit the worst of his fall into darkness?  

A lot of poets and troubadours have spent time in the darkness. Bonnie Raitt’s song Waitin’ for You to Blow gives addiction a voice, including the line, “Recovery is a fickle beast, better stick to what you know, ’cause I’m always ridin’ shotgun baby, just waitin’ for you to blow.”  

Rob Ford entered recovery and got clean. But the second act of his public life was cut short by cancer and we will never know how it might have gone.  

We do know that he had extraordinary compassion for people who are often ignored and his spirit touched many. He was an unlikely politician who engaged people’s hearts.  

I didn’t know Rob Ford, but I hope people will be kind with his memory, if only to give Canadian decency a moment to shine.